Staying Home

Sometime last year, Brigid developed a standard list of wishes she used whenever throwing coins in fountains. The list included new clothes, new toys, and having mommy home with her every day.

In December, I told my boss I wanted to leave my job, because both Steve and I were in positions of increasing responsibility, and it was creating tension at home around which one of us would be responsible when things came up with the girls, since we were both so fried from work most days. I felt like the girls were getting the short end of the stick, and I wanted to be there for them more than I was at the time.

I told her I would stay a few months into 2014, though, since I didn't want to leave her completely shorthanded because of my decision.

In February, she asked if I'd consider staying on the team, as her boss had suggested creating a part-time, from-home position for me, handling a lot of the monthly reporting that my boss has been trying to get off of her desk for months. The team and process I have been managing for the last two years are a team and process I've developed from the beginning, and they didn't want to lose my knowledge around either thing.

Feeling honored that they appreciated my hard work and grateful for the opportunity to keep some tie to the company (plus, excited that I wouldn't be abandoning all of my years at the company after working so hard to get where I was), I agreed to the opportunity. Plus, I told my boss I'd stay through the second quarter of the year, to help close out what I could for 2013.

Last week, while walking with my mom, Brigid apparently made a wish on a dandelion fluff that I would quit working sooner. When Mom told her it would be soon, Brigid said, 'Yes, but I wish it was sooner.'

On Monday, I was packing my work bag, when Brigid asked what I was doing. When I told her I was getting ready for work the next day, she gave me a sad face. I told her it was my last week, though, and that I would be staying home when the week was over, and she grabbed both of my hands and made me jump up and down in excitement with her.

Last night, I told her yesterday had been my last day in the office, and she told me, 'I know. You told me that already.'

This morning, when eating breakfast, she looked at me, smiled, and said, 'Mommy, I'm so glad you're staying home with me every day now.'

Me too, kid. Me too.

And this is how I aged 15 years in two hours...

Last Wednesday evening, Steve thought Caitlin was feeling a little warm, and even though I didn't really feel anything out of the ordinary, we took her temperature. It came in at 100.6, and since the internet told me that 100.4 is considered a fever when you're taking the poor kid's temperature through her bum, I told Steve we shouldn't give her anything for the fever, yet. It was mild, and I'm in the camp that thinks a fever isn't necessarily bad, and you need to let your body do what it needs to do to fight whatever it's fighting.

Well, I was in that camp, anyway.

On Thursday, we left for work before Caitlin woke up, and neither one of us thought to tell Steve's mom that C had been warm the night before, so she maybe needed a little extra attention that day. And since Caitlin was mostly acting fine that day, the thought that she might be sick wasn't even on Karen's radar, at all.

Around 3pm, she thought Caitlin seemed a little groggy, so she took the baby up for her afternoon nap. While Karen was changing C's diaper, she started seizing. Karen called 911 for the paramedics, then my father-in-law to come get Brigid, then Steve to let him know what was happening. At 3:30, Steve was calling me, texting me, emailing me, and knocking on my office door as I was trying to give a year-end review to one of my employees, to tell me that we needed to leave right then, because Caitlin was leaving our house in an ambulance, and he didn't have all of the details, but she was unconscious, and maybe had stopped breathing at one point, and we needed to meet them at the hospital.

I barely held it together until we got into the car, and then I lost it. As I told Steve, I had a complete breakdown when our house sale fell through in November. Not panicking while my baby was on the way to the hospital in an ambulance was not an option for me.

We beat the ambulance to the children's hospital by about 20 minutes, because we were closer coming from work than they were in coming from the house, and they weren't treating it as an emergency run, because they thought Caitlin was mostly ok, so they weren't using the lights/sirens. While we were waiting, the EMT called me for some health history on Caitlin, and he was able to tell me that she was responding well, and they thought the fever was just a febrile seizure, meaning her temperature spiked too quickly for her body to handle, but there wouldn't be any last damage from it.

My mother-in-law had ridden in the ambulance with Caitlin, and at the hospital, she had to recount her story at least four times for various nurses and doctors. She also had to explain how Caitlin had managed to get her leg caught in the coffee table while Steve and I were out of town last weekend, leaving an impressive bruise on her poor little thigh, because she had twisted herself in there nice and tight.

In the end, they all agreed that it was a febrile seizure, and we needed to alternate her on Tylenol and Motrin every three hours to keep her fever (probably caused by the same virus that had Brigid up and vomiting at 3:30 Friday morning, but that's another story...) down, and we took Baby Caitlin home to eat all of the popsicles.

You'd better believe that kid is getting medicated at the slightest hint of a fever from now on, because this is dangerous or not, this is not something I ever want to have to experience again.

Poor baby...

Weekend Shenanigans

Last weekend was our town's birthday celebration, and the Saturday night events included cake in the town circle, along with a free concert, various vendor booths, and fireworks. Or, as it was according to Brigid...FIREWORKS!!!!!!#$%#&*#?!!!!! Because, yeah...the kid loves her fireworks.

We headed over Saturday evening with a picnic dinner, and I was a little concerned, given how long we were going to be there, waiting for it to get dark enough for the fireworks, that Caitlin was going to be an absolute mess by the end of the night. She...was not.

Did you know babies (well, some babies, anyway) could be flexible in their scheduling? Did you know that if they get tired, those flexible babies will just...fall asleep? Wherever they are? I DID NOT KNOW THIS! I swear, I was the schedule enforcer with Brigid, and we never took her anywhere that would have her up past her bedtime, because I was sure that anything in the evening would ruin her sleep schedule for the month and a half following whatever that event was. And maybe it would have. But also, MAYBE NOT! Because Caitlin fell asleep on her bottle, and then let me put her down, still sleeping, in the wagon for awhile. Even with the music and the people and the general tomfoolery, she slept. And when she got tired of sleeping in the wagon? She fell back asleep in my arms, AND SLEPT THROUGH THE ENTIRE FIREWORK SHOW!!! She woke up on the trip home, but she went back to sleep again when we got her settled in for the night. I'm STILL in shock over how well that whole thing worked, even though she did basically the same thing during an evening baseball game a couple of weeks ago. I just don't EVER expect it to work.

Side note: Second kids, man. It is so much easier to be more laid-back with your second kid. Brigid is going to hate this, come the teenaged years.

And speaking of Brigid, she got her hair done while we were there. And she was thrilled...

It was so funny to watch her in action while we were waiting for the fireworks. There was a group of kids sitting next to us, watching something on someone's phone, and she just tried to make herself right at home with the group, squatting down in front of them to watch whatever they were watching over the top of the screen. It was adorable, and heartbreaking, all at once, because all I could focus on was the thought that maybe they don't want her bothering them? They were all older than her, what if one of them said something that made her sad? I am not READY for her to start branching out and trying to make new friends. She is my baby, and she should be happy hanging out with just her mommy. Forever. I DO NOT APPROVE OF THIS INDEPENDENCE THING.

Then two little girls in the bathroom line told her that her hair was beautiful, and she smiled the biggest smile I'd ever seen, and my heart broke into a million pieces because holy hell do I love that little girl more than anything else in the entire world (except for maybe the baby who was milk drunk and passed out in the wagon while all of this was going on...), and I will do everything in my power to keep that smile on her face as much as possible. 

I'm so incredibly lucky that these are my girls. I swear, I must have been someone completely amazing in my previous life to deserve having these two in this one.

Fall makes me happy...

Things I am grateful for this week:

1) I have a job flexible enough to allow me to meet Steve and Brigid for a lunchtime shopping trip at Old Navy. Even if that shopping trip was made a little less fun through the appearance of a toddler tantrum (or five)(seriously...kid was not happy today...).

2) Old Navy's ridiculously cute clothes for little girls...and their sales prices. Brigid is going to be the most adorably dressed little two-year old ever, come birthday time.

3) The Toys 'R Us closest to my house deciding to move to a new location, forcing them to offer everything in the old store up for 30-40% off...just in time for Brigid's birthday shopping. And Christmas shopping, for that matter. We are set.

4) Brigid's love of all things Nightmare Before Christmas, which, combined with a birthday only a couple of weeks before Halloween, means my early Halloween decorating binge will actually come in handy this year.

Actual conversation with my husband, earlier this week:
Me: I think I want to have a beach theme for Brigid's birthday this year.
Steve: Right, because our house is decorated EXACTLY LIKE A BEACH right now.
Me: So, you're saying that's a bad idea?
Steve: ...
Me: I guess we could do a Nightmare Before Christmas themed birthday.
Steve: That probably makes more sense.

5) The heat in Georgia finally breaking (even if it's just a temporary reprieve), because 65 degree weather means it's nice enough outside that I actually WANT TO RUN in the evenings. Which is kind of a good thing, since I'm also grateful for...

6) ...candy corn and pumpkin spice lattes. My Target has both a Starbucks and a candy aisle.

I'm not saying I want to move in there full time, or anything, but if you need me this month, that just might be the best place to find me...


Happy Friday!

Happy Days

Things I am grateful for this week:

- Watching Brigid dance to Lady Gaga with her stuffed cat and gold purse, after asking for her sunglasses, headband, and tutu. And seeing her get excited when 'Poke!' (Poker Face) comes on.

Also, my kid can name a Lady Gaga song after the opening notes. I'm not sure what this says about my parenting skills...

- The fact that B thinks I look like Snow White. Or she thinks that Snow White looks like me. Whatever it is, every time she sees Snow White somewhere, the excited pointing and the steady stream of 'mom-mom-mom-mom-mom' is pretty entertaining.

So what if my child is delusional? I will love her anyway.

- Steve taking the recycling out last night for this morning's pick-up, since I was too late in getting it out last week, and our garage was being overrun with old magazines and aluminum cans. I am especially grateful for this because I overslept this morning and came pretty close to missing the pick-up for the second straight week.

Yes, if I hadn't stayed up playing gin on my iPad last night, I probably wouldn't have overslept, but I'm going to say it was totally worth it.

- No line at the gas station this morning!

It's the little things that get me, I guess...

- Being able to take a vacation with my family.

Ok, I like the big things, too...

- And most importantly, receiving a cheerful diagnosis from Brigid's cardiologist.

Hands down, that won the week, right there. Yay, B's heart!

Happy Friday, everyone!