So, we've entered this stage...
I know she doesn't mean anything by it. I know she just wants to see what happens. I know she thinks it's funny when she does see my reaction.
But that doesn't mean I want it to keep happening.
You see, Brigid is starting to become a hitter. When I'm getting her ready for bed, she thinks it's funny to clap my face between her hands, and she's not exactly gentle about it. She's got a pretty decent slap on her, in fact, which I will celebrate if she needs to use it on some dumb boy in the future, but which isn't too appealing to me right now. The moment she raises her hand, I involuntarily flinch, because I know what's coming...
...and she finds that hilarious.
And yet, I can't stop myself from doing it, because it stings a little when she makes contact. But I have no idea how to get through to her that hitting? It's not ok.
Any advice???
Kyle hits similarly. Not out of anger but when I tell him no, he gets this look on his face that's basically, "I know how to really piss you off."
ReplyDeleteI treat it like any other thing he shouldn't do: punish immediately, talk about it immediately after that, acknowledge and praise the opposite behavior (when he's sweet) and acknowledge the bad behavior in others as bad across the board.
We use time outs. I know a lot of people think they're not effective, but it seems to work okay for us. As soon as she raises her hand, she gets the look and if her hand comes down and makes contact (whether hard or soft), she gets a time out.
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No suggestions here, because we're going through it right now too. :( I totally sympathize with you!
ReplyDeleteOh goodness...my son turns 2 next month, and he's been doing the hitting thing for close to 6 months now. It started just like that...he thought it was funny. Then he started doing it in anger. I hate to tell you this, but...consistent punishment is key. When D first started doing it, I would grab his hand after he hit me and very firmly tell him, "We do NOT hit Mommy!". Then, if he hit me when Daddy was around, he stepped in and said the same thing while grabbing his hand. (We wanted to give the message that punishment could come from both of us). After the third time in a row, it was timeout time. At first, around the 18-20 month stage, he didn't really understand it, and I would sit with him on the chair and keep explaining that he was in timeout for hitting. Now, at nearly 2, he totally gets it. If he hits me or anything else, I remind him that if he continues to hit, he'll go to timeout. We still have hits and misses (bad pun, I know!), but it's getting better I think. But it SUCKS to be in the beginning of it! Just wanted to tell you that it does get better! :-)
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